Wednesday 27 October 2010

Accepting and Explaining

It’s strange how easy it is to become insular and build up little prejudices.

Over the past few years I’ve met quite a lot of quite different kinds of transsexuals, transvestites and cross-dressers.

All different in lots of ways and similar in others.

Mostly they are people that want to express a certain femininity in the way that they look and act … in the way that they are … in who they are.

Just occasionally there are challenges though. Once in a while someone that wears a dress or a skirt and blouse … but no makeup or stockings … slightly hairy legs … sandals … socks.

It’s a delicate kind of issue for me to write about here because friends that read bits and pieces of some of the things that I post will think of people that I might be thinking about.

Really though … I’m not writing about any specific individual. More about my own feelings on a concept.

There’s a part of me that feels that a person that doesn’t “make the effort” shouldn’t be at the get-togethers.

Another part of me feels a sense of shame about this feeling. I mean … if I’m not able to accept such a person … do I have any reasonable right to hope that “mainstream” society should be prepared to accept Andrea?

So … I know that I need to learn how to deal with this … and move on from a reluctant and passive acceptance towards a willingness to be a friend.

Today at work I had an unusually angry few moments. I work with software … and there is a recurring conflict concerning release date deadlines … feature-creep … mistakes … over optimistic predictions.

The deadline was the end of October.

At the meeting the boss expressed a certain degree of dissatisfaction.

I guess though that … whatever the circumstances … I’m not prepared to accept disrespect from my employer. So I made this clear. And I was angry. But, I think, respectful.

Thankfully, he respected this.

And in the end … by rationally and reasonably explaining the state of things he was able to get a level of willing commitment to work longer hours for “free” that would have been impossible to get by just ranting and raving.

And in amongst all that extra work … there is Pink Punters on Saturday … Surrey Swans on Sunday … and a niece’s wedding next weekend.

I know, things could be a lot worse.

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